Good morning, Good night.

Lauren is three months old and she is still far from sleeping through the night. The first two months of her life I must have been running on post-partum hormonal fuel or life-change adrenaline. I don't know...but I wasn't too tired.

Then month three hit, we are settled into our new home and you would think it would be all better, or at least easier. Well, it is easier, but Lauren's lack of sleep (and thus my lack of sleep) has accumulated and taken its toll on me. It has been hard the last few days, and I have been feeling especially sorry for myself.

A few days ago I was out on the front lawn training my dogs to use their invisible pet fence. An old man started to walk toward me from the house across the street. I could not cross the fence barrier to meet him without buzzing my dog, so I stood and waited for him to slowly reach me. It was awkward. Once he was in earshot he began to talk. He introduced himself and welcomed me to the neighborhood. He told me he had seem me and my family, and had been meaning to say hello, but he had not gotten the chance. He explained that his wife was very ill, and that his days were consumed with caring for her. I nodded to be polite, and in genuine sympathy. We exchanged niceties for a few moments longer, then parted ways. I walked my dog back toward the house and he began his slow stroll toward his home. He had been friendly, polite, but sad.

Today has a gorgeous, sunny, crisp afternoon. I was holding Lauren while watching the dogs out back as they continue to master their fence system. The air was perfect on my skin, but slightly cool for Lauren, so I stood in our mudroom with the door ajar enjoying the sunshine and the pretty neighborhood landscape. I turned toward the front of the house and noticed the old man from across the street. Walking slowly but steadily up the street, with his wife on his arm. She was very slight, her steps ginger and her bony, white fingers clutched a tissue. They walked slowly, his steps measuring hers, and I kissed Lauren's forehead as I watched them move up the driveway and disappear into the house. As I stood there I noticed how new Lauren was, and how old they were. I also noticed what a perfect, sunny September day it is, and I wondered if the old woman would live to see another day like this next year. I shed a tear for a total stranger. I do not even know her name.

As I wiped the tear from my face I kissed Lauren and walked away from the window. Sort of helps you keep things in perspective.